I'm crying right now because for the first time I realize how much I hate change sometimes. I just basically lost one of the best friends I've ever had because of change. She used to be the absolute only thing that got me through the day and if I didn't talk to her I could not stay calm. She was the one solid thing I could always count on no matter what. I'm sure you know what I mean. Everyone has that one person or thing that is just always solid and can make you feel secure and just comfortable with anything, even the things that you're unsure of. And even though we weren't really "best friends" she was truly my solid. I've missed her so much and I finally got the opportunity to talk to her and she's changed so much. She's got her own security now and all of these things going on in her life and just makes me feel like I wasn't the same to her as she was to me. I'm so frustrated. I'm aggravated and concerned and annoyed and selfish and jealous and all of these other things all at the same time. This is so weird to me.

I just finally realized that you can't hold onto anything because nothing real ever stays.

By the way I don't want the comments that say "Quit whining, welcome to the teenage life." and "welllll.. change is inevitable." I just wanted to get that out. I don't care what you think.